Bunny Booty
by OneRambunctiousWriter
Summary: When Elsa meets the Easter Bunny in her backyard, her entire world is flipped upside down. An Elsanna(no incest) Easter themed Fantasy Modern AU.
1. Prologue

**Note: This fic is comedic in nature. I will be poking fun at beliefs and opinions. Including my own beliefs and opinions, if that helps. Also, mature subject matter. I'm talking about sexy stuff. DL;DR. Also it's Elsanna. DL;DR. But I know you'll read, because you secretly love it.**

* * *

T'was the night before Easter, and all through the house, the children were stirring, and annoying Anna's spouse. "C'mon, Aunt Elsa! Tell us about how you met the Easter Bunny!" The children exclaimed. Apparently her jackass older brother Hans had mentioned to his bratty little kids the time the Easter Bunny arrived at their house.

Elsa smiled down at the excited children, "I guess I could tell you all. But you'd have to swear to keep it a secret." They all nodded excitedly. "Well then, I suppose I will tell you. To begin, I was never one to indulge in the fantastical, unexplainable part of life. No part of me ever believed in such mythical things. I had never followed religious teachings, I did not believe in Santa, the Easter Bunny, or the gosh-darned Tooth Fairy. Since I was a little girl, I would have no part in such fantasy. Unless it was a sexy online MMO." She explained.

"Do you subscribe to any religious teachings now, Aunty Elsa?" One of the kids asked.

"Well if you must know, I've embraced my Viking blood, and am now a pagan." Elsa explained.

"That's interesting, Aunty Elsa. What kind?"

There was a moment of silence. "What?"

"What kind?" The child asked again. "Are you Wiccan? Germanic? Maybe Greco-Roman?"

"Well Germanic, clearly." She answered. "Viking blood, you nitwit."

"Interesting." The child replied. "What do you call your chief deity? Do you call him Odin? Or do you preffer the Old Norse name, Óðinn? Or perhaps the Anglo-Saxon variation of Woden? Or maybe Proto-Germanic Wodanaz? Or-"

"Shut it, ya punk!" Elsa snapped. "Now, back to the story."

"What's an MMO?" Another child asked.

Elsa sighed, this wasn't part of the story. "A Massive Multiplayer Online game."

"Why is it Massive? Is that the sexy part?"

"That's not relevant!" Elsa cried. "Back to the story!"

"What about the mythical things?" Another little brat piped up.

"What?"

"The mythical things, like Santa, the Easter Bunny, or the gosh-darned Tooth Fairy." The girl asked.

"Well clearly!" She shouted. "I'm telling you about how I met the Easter Bunny! I clearly believe now!"

"But is there more?"

Elsa sighed. "Yes. There's all sorts of things out there. Like vampires, dragons, and dark magic."

"Dark magic?" A different kid asked.

"Y'know, like how they make Cheez Whiz." Elsa answered.

"Oh."

"Are we good now?" She asked. Everyone was finally silent. "So one day, I woke up early..."

* * *

**Author's Note: I started this 2 years ago. During the years of 2015 and the beginning of 2016, my personal life was kinda fucked. That affected my writing. Bunny Booty got really out there. Now that it's been so long, I decided (in September) to restart this fic, because the idea was the most original I've ever had.**

**Hopefully I'll be able to keep the humour of the original iteration, while creating a cohesive story.**

**I cannot promise updates will be super frequent, there may be months between chapters, but I have a very good reason. I've been spending my time working on an original story, as being an author is my dream job.**

**Hopefully you all will enjoy.**


	2. Chapter One: Enter Easter Bunny

Elsa's eyes blinked open. _What time is it?_ There wasn't any sunlight in her room. Worried, she shot out of bed. _How long did I sleep!? Why didn't anyone wake me!?_ But no, it was not late. Her alarm clock began to mock her, as her eyes locked with the wretched machine. "Five fucking thirty in the goddamn morning!?" She yelled aloud. No, it was too early to be up! But alas she was.

"Shut up!" Came another shout, originating from the next room over.

"Sorry!" She yelled back, meekly. Perhaps yelling wasn't the best idea at _five fucking thirty in the goddamn morning_. She looked to her bed, and pondered going back to sleep. She doubted she could get back to sleep, the scare of having slept till ten pm again (yes again) having shocked her awake. There was only one thing to do now. She put on a pair of plaid pajama pants, and a t-shirt. Dressed, she made her way downstairs, her laptop in hand. She began brewing the coffee in the kitchen, and then went to the living room. She set her laptop down, plugged her headphones in, and began watching what any girl her age watched at five fucking thirty in the goddamn morning. Lesbian porn.

Her hand had made its way under her wasteband before "morning, pervert" was yelled at her from across the room. The offending hand was quickly hidden behind her back, and a glare formed on her face. It was her jackass older brother, Hans. "I was just... Scratching." She responded, crossing her arms.

"Right." He nodded. "You were just 'scratching' to 'Teen redhead Elle Alexandra and blonde Mia Malkova'. Again." He dodged the tissue box that was thrown at him.

"What are you even doing up? It's five in the morning." She shot.

"You woke me up with your bitching." Hans reminded her. _Right..._ "And, for the record, it's six now." He walked over and set one of the coffee mugs he was carrying down on the coffee table.

"Uh oh." Elsa said, staring at the offered mug. Her eyes drifted up to her brother, who was grinning smugly. "Uh oh." She repeated. "What is it this time?"

"You've got to take out the garbage." He answered, still grinning.

"Goddamnit! You were suppose to do that yesterday!" She growled.

"Well, I didn't." He replied. He then motioned to the coffee, "and now you have to."

"Damn coffee-favour system." She grumbled, before chugging the cup. "I brewed it, that should count for something."

"It warms my soul." Hans replied.

"What soul, ginger?" She sniped. He just laughed, and left for his room, to do Hans-stuff. "Fucking asshole." She grumbled, taking the garbage bag, and hauling it outside. "Who does he think he is anyway?" She retrieved the spare key from under the single, obvious, empty planter, and opened the garage door. "Why did I agree to that stupid coffee-favour bullshit?"

Then suddenly a rabbit went running past Elsa, causing the girl to jump. The garbage bag fell out of her hand, and tore on the concrete, leaving the entire driveway covered in garbage. "Son of a bitch!" She cried. _A rabbit? We don't even have rabbits in this area. Do we?_ A few crows flew overhead, landing in the backyard, where the rabbit had run off to.

Concerned, Elsa made her way to the backyard. The crows had surrounded the poor little bunny, and were crawing at it aggressively. Elsa ran over, and shooed the crows away. The rabbit still sat there, but was now looking up at Elsa. "Hey there, bunny." Elsa cooed, picking up the rabbit. "It's okay. You're safe now."

Elsa's eyebrows shot up, when all of the sudden her hands were under the armpits of some girl. "Thanks!" She beamed. "That was almost nasty!" She chuckled. "I mean, what's up with crows and their greaser subculture, eh?"

There was a moment of silence. "What does that even mean?" Was all that Elsa could say.

The girl's face fell. "I... I don't know."

Elsa's brain was slow to process what just happened. "Who- What are you?" She asked, her head tilting to the side.

The girl's grin returned, and she laughed. "I'm the Easter Bunny, silly!" She exclaimed.

"Oh." Elsa replied. Armed with this new information, Elsa did the only thing a rational person would. She fainted.

* * *

**Author's note: Hey y'all. I don't know if FF sends notifications when updates are made to a chapter on a followed story, so maybe some of you haven't seen, but I've begun a complete rewrite of Bunny Booty.**

**Numerous things have happened since I started the fic, including just an increase in actual writing skill (I think), so I figured a complete restart was in order.**

**I'll try and keep the same level of humour, without so much... Yeah.**

**For those of you who have already read the new Prologue, go read it again, because I updated it (I added a few more lines, and changed some formatting).**

**Hopefully you've enjoyed. See ya next time.**


End file.
